(CNN) -- A few weeks ago, I received a Facebook message out of the blue asking to stop my support of animal abuse. The person behind the message said I may not realize it, but she believes what I do for a living is inherently cruel.
She described things she feels are wrong with animal agriculture - how baby calves are used for veal production, how cows are sucked dry of their milk until they can no longer function, and how pigs and chickens are crammed into crates to the point where they cannot move. She believes that livestock farming needs to end in favor of plant-based diets to feed the world's population.
When I asked where she had witnessed these cruelties or learned of this information, I received a number of links to articles and videos from groups like PETA, Mercy for Animals, Farm Sanctuary, and the Humane Society of the United States (HSUS); groups that have a focused agenda to stop animal agriculture with little to no consideration for the farmer.
This is not the animal agriculture I work in. The stories she had were moving and certainly lead people to take action, but they do not represent the agriculture community.
There is nothing more frustrating than being approached by someone who believes I am an evil person for what I do, without ever having a chance to voice an opinion about my experience. This happens time and again in conversations about food and agriculture topics and we are just digging ourselves a deeper hole, but we can find a better avenue to communication.
The discussion continued, and I asked, again, where she had witnessed these cruel circumstances. She pasted several statements filled with statistics and graphic descriptions of the animal housing conditions and treatment standards. A quick Google search found these statements easily copied from the above mentioned group websites.
I shared links to a few blog posts and videos I have created in the past to describe animal care on my family's farm, guidelines farmers follow for better animal care, and a series of posts to detail work in CAFOs (confined animal feeding operations), or what some call "factory farms". I view these as a snapshot of how I perceive modern cattle farming.
No matter the effort or the questions I asked, I continued to receive prepared statements and figures from these organizations. I felt like it was one large brick wall.
Then I had to step back and ask myself, is this how messages are received from farmers and ranchers as we try to use science when discussing modern food and farming? The clash of emotion and science and neither is making headway.
As a whole, our communities of farmers and customers need to approach these conversations and be more respectful of others' opinions. Food will always be a difficult subject to discuss. Everyone has different expectations for their food; how it tastes, how it should be grown, and how much it should cost. We definitely have skewed perceptions of how our wants and needs should be accepted by the other side of the table, even though we share a common ground -- eating food.
When we approach these conversations, I want to encourage us all to take a few steps for better communication and dialogues.
First, we have two ears and one mouth. We all need to listen first before we speak. Everyone possesses their own opinions and when we can hear the other viewpoints, we can better respond to the issues at hand.
Second, leave your first impressions at the door. Assumptions need to be laid aside. Ask questions. What is the other person really asking? The better you understand and are willing to listen to what the other side of issue has to say, the better you will understand your own beliefs.
Finally, understand the world is not out to burn you. Haters will abound, latch on to the most emotional, exciting aspect and blow it out of proportion. These folks will often stand on the most prominent soapbox, seeking the most attention. This by no means qualifies them as right or their stance any more substantial. Many more people mean well and stay much less vocal.
Conversations require cooperation from both sides to be productive. I am no communications professional, but I do know that both sides need to evaluate their approach and listen more.
So here is my challenge, what questions do you have about modern farming? And are you willing to consider asking them in a way that makes it easier to engage a conversation rather than an accusation?
Instead of "Why do you poison our food supply with chemicals and GMOs?" maybe someone not on the farm could ask a farmer, "How does your use of chemicals and technology affect the safety of food and our environment?" I know it takes a mind shift and I am trying to make one on my end too, but if both sides shift toward openness rather than assumption.
So think about it: if you could ask a farmer of any crop, almonds to zucchinis, where would you start? I'll do my best to find farmers to help with the answers in a similar spirit.